Have Paula, Ryan and Randy really never heard the word humdinger?

Sure, some of Simon's expressions are occasionally a little odd or cryptic, but the word "humdinger"? I'm familar with that word, Paula. You're the one that sounded pretty dumb questioning it.

I guess this long disquistion on the word "humdinger" is just a way to avoid getting to the show because I really don't have much to say. I'm glad we got the best final two we could have expected, and the show wasn't even that bad tonight because the "going home" clips are always enjoyable. There's still something special about watching someone realize that in just a couple months, they've become pretty famous--even though a year from now most of those people won't be interested anymore.

Finally, I've read a bunch of articles in the last couple weeks providing ways to fix American Idol, in the wake of its big ratings decline. For instance, in Entertainment Weekly this week, one of their critics gave seven ways to fix the show. The first, tone down the product placement, is an excellent one, but one we probably won't be seeing (and to be fair, Idol has always been kind of a leader in product placement. Didn't they have that Coke room by the second season?) Then there's the idea that's really good but completely irrelevant: Stop the medleys at the beginning of the results show. I agree they're bad, but I can't imagine anyone is out there going, "If they just get rid of that two minute medley on Wednesday's show, I'll watch the show again." And then there's two ideas that I don't think will help. First, he suggests replacing Randy and Paula as judges. Yes, they can sometimes be dead wood, but getting rid of them would be altering the entire spirit of the show. Talking about Paula's strange behavior and making fun of Randy's vocabulary is as integral to the show as people singing. Plus, you couldn't have three really critical judges--the show would be too mean. Just make Simon the first judge to give his remarks and that will shake up the show, as it did for an episode a few seasons ago.

Then, the writer, Mark Harris, mentions something that Simon has also suggested: Getting more current, fresher mentors. This isn't a bad idea, I'm just not sure how much difference it would make. Wasn't one of the most memorable episodes of the show season two's Neil Sedaka night? Neil Diamond night could have been pretty cool, if the singers had sung well. Wasn't Gwen Stefani night pretty weak? And if we have hip-hop night with Kanye West, is that really going to work for some of the singers--or for a good chunk of the audience? Does anyone really want to see a Nickelback night?

The simple answer for improving the show is getting better contestants. I'm not totally sure how to do that, but I'll try to have some thoughts next week. Fingerhut out.